by Zach Raffio. @zachraffio. NEW YORK, NY - Local theatregoer Rich Culver—upon leaving a performance of the new Broadway play Giant, showcasing the 1983 scandal revolving around antisemitic remarks made by author Roald Dahl—was shocked and disappointed to learn that the man who made such remarks also wrote some very famous children’s books. “It’s one thing to defend Hitler, but it’s another to do a whole book about a chocolate factory when I can’t even taste the chocolate. Do

by Edward Precht. @pertoltprecht. NEW YORK, NY – The secret to a great piece of art is a great, unanswerable question, and, in the case of Proof – now playing at the Booth Theatre – that question is the authenticity of a newly-discovered mathematical formula. Earlier today, the brightest minds behind The Broadway Beat announced they’d solved said formula, and it turns out it’s “80085,” also known as the numeric spelling of the English word “boobs.” “Its simplicity is in its c

by Ben Schrager. Instagram: @ben.schrager. Bluesky: @benschrager.bsky.social. CONEY ISLAND, NY - The serenity of the seashore’s surf stopped short this Sunday, sliced by screams in its stead: Sandy, a seashell seller washed up dead around 1:58 or 1:59 this afternoon. “Everyone knew her,” said local baker Betty Botter, while exchanging a bit of bitter butter she bought at the bodega for some better butter. “She sells… well, sold seashells by the seashore,” blubbered Betty. “So