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Broadway Beat
Alien Civilization Discovers Actor’s Self-Tape Bloopers; Announces Intent to Exterminate Humanity
by Conrad Sager. @conradsager. EARTH - An alien civilization from a far-off galaxy recently concluded a vast study assessing the merits...
Broadway Beat
Theatre Kid Misunderstands Dry January, Only Reads Tom Stoppard
by Zach Raffio. @zachraffio. HAVERHILL, MA. - Local theatre fan Mark Lopshin has reportedly misunderstood the meaning behind “dry...
Broadway Beat
Mouth Currently Eating Hearty Beef Chili Temporarily Closes, Announces Plan to Reopen for Next Bite
by Zach Raffio. @zachraffio. NEW YORK, NY - Local man Jeremy Curl’s mouth - currently taking in copious amounts of smoky, hearty beef...
Broadway Beat
Sad! This Dancer Didn’t Post About Her Class at BDC and Now She’s Been Exiled
by Emily Jones. @ejonesy__. NEW YORK, NY – Aspiring Broadway theatre actor Annie Shepherd has been exiled from the theatrical community...
Broadway Beat
Mr. Cellophane Sued for Trademark Infringement After Refusing to Go By “Mr. Transparent Wrapping”
by Lisa Cowan. @lisallyblonde. CHICAGO - Cook County resident Amos Hart, known locally as “Mr. Cellophane”, is facing a trademark...
Broadway Beat
Gamechanger: Local Woman Discovers Ticket Not Required to Take Instagram Photo in Front of Theater
by Rich Taylor. @RTinDC. SECAUCUS, NJ - After enduring years of cyber-generated FOMO, local woman Shannon Higgins had an epiphany,...
Broadway Beat
REPORT: Dancer Sitting with Legs in Weird Position
by Louie Aronowitz. @louiearonowitz. SAN FRANCISCO - Theatre dancer Tessa Brogue has been seen sitting in a normal social setting with...
Broadway Beat
Steven Spielberg Convinced Rival Directors Created Omicron to Ruin "West Side Story" Ticket Sales
by Alexandra Bowman. @scripta_bene (Twitter). LOS ANGELES – Following his West Side Story adaptation's disappointing box office...
Broadway Beat
Aw! Actor Finally Makes Parents Proud by Playing a Doctor
by Catherine Weingarten. @sarahkaneissexy. NEW YORK, NY - In our feel-good story of the week, local actor Hudson Johansburg finally made...
Broadway Beat
We Began Reflecting on the Year in Theatre But Had a Panic Attack So We’re Outside Getting Some Air
by Zach Raffio. @zachraffio. Ah, another year of powerful performances, eye-popping set pieces, and engrossing stories taking over stages...
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