"SIX" Producers Prepare for Next COVID Variant by Rebranding as "Anywhere Between SIX and FOUR"

by Gwen Coburn. @sadgrlsongsgwen.

NEW YORK, NY. - When asked if the show had a plan for the next wave of COVID-19, the SIX production team assured fans that the show would go on - with some notable changes.

“We realized that large cast musicals are less practical during a surge, so we did some condensing,” explained production manager Mark Kendall, as he sharpied out the old title on a stack of posters. “SIX might be a stretch, but FOUR honestly seemed like a safe bet”

Dramaturg Paula Shoemaker - whose job just became somehow both way easier and far more difficult - informed us that it had been all hands on deck to prepare for the quick revamp.

“I like this version better actually,” said Paula, while she hastily sewed the left half of Catherine Parr’s costume to the right half of Anna of Cleeves’. “It’s a classic theatrical device to have one actress play multiple roles - very Lily Tomlin in The Search For Signs Of Intelligent Life In the Universe. Plus it’s a cool challenge for our cast. Even Lily never played two characters at the exact same time!”

Richard Weatherford, historian and curator at Hampton Court Palace, admitted the new version might be confusing to Tudor-afficinados.

“The changes they made to the story are, historically, unlikely” said Weatherford, shining the museum’s display guillotine. "But as the producers repeatedly emphasized when they reached out, we don’t have definitive proof that Jane Seymour didn’t fake her own death and return as Catherine Howard.”

Press agent Kelly Jones told us that, in spite of all the work to be done for the rebrand, the team is excited to keep bringing empowering stories and girl power multiple-part harmonies to their audiences.

“Shows evolve, and we must as well. We know SIX fans will love the show even if it's FIVE, FOUR, or once our Anne Boleyn learns how to Tibetan-throat sing, THREE.”